Monday 26th March
Last Friday, at around 17.29, there was a paper jam at Lourdes Components; just an innocent little paper jam. But this innocent little paper jam nearly led to a very embarrassing faux pas later that evening. Let me explain. Knowing Tanya wouldn’t be going, I went to the Tavern on Friday night to meet my friends. As I walked into the pub I was busy thinking sorts of thoughts about the emails from ‘Heidi’ designed by the office slut to discredit Steve and ruin his relationship with Jaycee. I wondered if they were on the printer, I wondered if I should remove them on Monday morning, I thought about the possible consequences of doing so and even the prospect of coming clean and telling Jaycee everything. Deciding against the tell-all option I started to wonder if Jaycee would fall for the emails if she did read them. Maybe she wouldn’t. Maybe she would believe when he told her it was a lie. But wouldn’t that lead to a forced confession of why April would want to set him up?
So, as I walked into the pub, with all these things going around in my mind, I didn’t recognise the pretty brunette practically sitting on Ben’s lap and nearly asked what her name was. It was the formally blonde Alana but all the recognition landmarks had changed. Her long blonde hair was now chestnut brown. Her wary body language towards Ben was now the complete opposite, and her sidekick Tanya was nowhere to be seen.
Luckily Ben addressed her by name just as I was about to open my mouth and make a huge fool of myself. I must have looked shocked to see her all over Ben because she looked at me with a grimacy smile and Neal gave me a look that strongly suggested I stop gawping.
“Yes Rachael, all that running paid off, you are now looking at the newest happy couple in our midst, Ben and Alana.”
“And what a fine couple they do make,” Michael said, raising his glass. He was just relieved there might finally be an end to the string of random girls his brother used to bring to all their family events. Everybody clinked glasses to cheers Ben and Alana while Laura pulled the empty seat out next to her for me to sit on. To my delight there was a glass of wine already waiting for me at the table. I should turn up late more often. Derren clunked glasses too but I could see his real thoughts bubbling away behind his eyes. I think part of him blames Ben and Alana for bringing Tanya into his life. I just hope the bigger part is taking some responsibility for what he did himself.
So, that was Friday. It got a bit messy but Derren didn’t get too drunk, nor did he pester me for a change of heart or drive home under the influence. That alone made it a successful night in my books. It is now Monday, the last ever Monday I will sit at this desk, in this office, doing this work. I’m panicking more than ever now about the agencies. None of the three I belong to have anything to offer, not even an interview. The temp scene is dead unless I have SAGE experience. All three of them called me to make sure I was sure I didn’t have SAGE experience. The last I heard, sage was a herb so I guess that answers that.
April and Jaycee are both acting as though nothing has happened. Does that mean nothing has happened? Or does it mean Jaycee is the poker ace I thought she was? I don’t know. I guess I’ll have to wait and see.
Thursday 29th March
The weight of my job situation is playing heavy on my mind now. Tomorrow is my last day and I have nothing lined up. Nothing. Although I do now know SAGE is to do with payroll.
My work here is pretty much done and I’m more concerned with finding a job than I am with trying to prove my diligence so I spend most of the morning on the phone to the girls at the agencies. For the umpteenth time today I peer at my mobile, willing it to ring. To my surprise it does and in my desperation I answer it before the end of the first ring.
“Hello?”
“Ah Rachael, hello.”
“Oh, Victor, how was your trip?” I ask, trying to hide my disappointment. It’s not the answer to my prayers after all.
“Yes, yes, it was most relaxing, thank you. We didn’t do as much walking as we would have liked to, mind. Martha’s ingrown toenail was giving her jip.”
“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that Victor.”
“Never mind about that. Listen, I am calling to see if you are free one day this week for that dinner we talked about? I was thinking tomorrow maybe?”
“And you’re still not going to tell me what this is about?”
“And ruin all my fun? It’s nothing to worry about. I can promise you that.”
“Ok, let me see, Friday night? I have no plans so… yeah, tomorrow will be great.”
“Perfect, perfect. Say… 19.30?”
“Sounds good to me.”
“And you remember where we are from the wake?”
“I do, yes.”
“Lovely. I shall see you then my dear.”
“Yes, see you then, then. Bye now.”
By the time I put the phone down I see April is packed up and ready to leave a whole half an hour early and as she leaves I practically dive into her desk and I find myself shaking as I enter her deleted folder. I just have to know what’s going on. The suspense has been killing me. As usual I scroll back to the last email I read and start from there. There was nothing on Friday of last week but thankfully, Sezza emails April on Monday and, well, I’ll let you see for yourself…
Sezza: Monday 26th March 10.11
Hi April, I was just wondering if you’d changed your mind about planting those bogus emails, seeing as you bottled it on Friday. I thought maybe you’d had a change of heart…
Office Slut: 10.16
I didn’t do it because Steve had gone home early, where’d the fun have been in that?
Sezza: 10.31
So when are you going to do it then?
Office Slut: 10.33
This Friday, after lunch. Why do you care so much?
I forgot to ask. Did you hand your notice in?
Sezza: 10.50
Err, no. I’ll do it tonight because I was ill this weekend so I didn’t go in at all 
(
I had a stinking cold, still feel a bit run down from it. Also, Sophia walked out last week so I’m kinda glad I didn’t.
Office Slut: 10.58
Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot you had a cold. Maybe it’s that new nail technician, she was sneezing loads when I went. Such a shame Brenda left, she was much better than this newbie. I’m going to find a new one, what’ll you do?
Sezza: 11.09
I don’t know, I like the new girl. She knows the calorie content of everything you could ever want to know – your into all that sh it, I thought you’d like chatting to her?
***
Nails, nails, nails… Calories, calories, calories… Blah, blah, blah… To be honest, there is nothing very interesting in their work time chats until Thursday morning when April has a bit of a heart to heart with Sezza.
***
Sezza: Thursday 29th March 10.14
Hey Apes, today is the day isn’t it? That you’re going to wrongly incriminate Steve to get back at him and simultaneously ruin Jaycee’s life?
Office Slut: 10.21
What the hell Sarah, where’d that come from? And anyway, it’s tomorrow, not today. I do know you’re not happy about this but I don’t see what this has to do with you. I saw them laughing in the kitchen together at lunch time yesterday, looking all happy and it made me realise, I can’t let him be happy, not after what he has done to me.
Sezza: 10.24
But you have a boyfriend and you knew he loved her, is this about your feelings or your pride?
Office Slut: 10.31
I know you think it’s a pride thing Sez but it’s not. I really love him, well, loved him. He gave me attention in the way Greg never does anymore. Greg doesn’t even know I exist but Steve, he made me feel like I’m the most important thing in the universe. And he is so funny, the way him and Gianni have the whole office laughing all the time, everyone likes Steve, he’s popular in a way I’d love to be.
Sezza: 11.41
Ah Apes, he treats girls like that to meet his own ends, then look what he does to them?
Office Slut: 11.46
OMG, Steve just squeezed the bi tches shoulder, right in front of me. I can’t believe he is rubbing it in. I’m so tempted to plant these emails now just to take that smug look off his face. I won’t though. I’m sticking to my plan.
I’m leaving early today Sez, I can’t watch them heavy petting right in front of my anymore. Call me later.
Sezza: 11.57
Ok Apes, just ignore them ok? And don’t confuse love with attention. Steve was giving you what you were missing from Greg. He also has an easy way with people you wish you had. These things are more like displaced desire and forgotten needs than love. You will get over this and when you do, I think you’ll regret what you’re planning to do.
Friday 30th March
It’s Friday, it’s my last day as a wage earner and it’s the day April plans to ruin Steve and Jaycee’s relationship for good. I have been avoiding the kitchen every lunch time this week for fear of Jaycee telling me how happy her and Steve are now. I just knew I would end up telling her what I know and upset the apple cart here at work within Jaycee’s team when, for all I know, April isn’t planning on going through with it. After all, Sezza’s last emails to her made a lot of sense, above April confusing love for attention and seeing traits in Steve she wish she had herself. Maybe that was enough to make her change her mind.
All my work here with the filing is done and I am now eking out the process of tweaking and preening so that I still look busy as I can’t afford for Sam to send me home early and unpaid. Sam is happy that everything is in order and is acting very peculiar around me. Jaycee told me that is him being grateful and appreciative. It’s so cringe-worthy and awkward to watch that I think I preferred mean Sam.
Half way through the afternoon Jaycee bounds over to the printer to wait for pages and pages of pages to print. The only time I have seen her print this many pages is when she is pulling off her WI. But historically, that has always happened at the end of the day, not in the middle of the afternoon. I want to ask her what she’s printing but can’t think of a good enough to reason to pitch the question. I glance over to April and find her sitting absolutely still. There is something about the unnatural stillness of the back of April’s head that tells me the deed has been done, the papers have been planted. Too afraid to look behind her at the printer, she looks like a cardboard cut-out. She has done it. I don’t know why I’m so surprised, but I am. I guess I thought she would be the better person and overcome her anger. I feel ashamed for letting it happen and now that it’s too late I wish I’d warned Jaycee about April.
Jaycee stands by my desk, skilfully flicking through her papers.
“Oh my gosh, I’ve just remembered, it’s your last day today isn’t it?”
“It is.”
“Have you got anything else lined up?”
“Err, not exactly.”
“Oh.” Jaycee stops skimming pages to grimace at me.
“It’s ok, something will turn up,” I say, but Jaycee has stopped listening to me and is staring at her papers with great intent. I know what she is reading. I know it word for word. My palms begin to sweat. I stare at Jaycee, unable to ask her what is wrong because my throat has become dry.
“Err, will you excuse me please?” she asks as the colour drains from her face.
“Yeah. Sure,” I squeak nervously. My heart races and I am glad I have finished all my work because I won’t be able to concentrate now, not one iota.
Jaycee turns around to see Steve standing right behind her. He is clenching his teeth and is looking really angry. I’m confused, does he know? How does he know?
The couple make a beeline for the empty office where Steve slams the door shut causing the rest of office to look up silent unison. I’m not entirely sure what is going on so I look to April, she is the only one keeping her head down and for the first time since this all started I feel actual contempt towards this girl.
After what seems like hours but is actually only twenty minutes, Jaycee and Steve walk out of the empty office and straight into Sam’s. Sam ushers them in and closes the door gently after sweeping the office to see who was watching. Most of the office put their heads down in response and my eyes flit to April again. She is watching the door as though her eyes have the power to lazar clean through it.
Steve and Jaycee stay in Sam’s office for nearly forty minutes this time before coming back out into the main office where the atmosphere has grown tense. Everybody knows something is wrong. Steve walks out the front door with Gianni and a packet of fags while Sam and Jaycee walk over to April and ask her to wait for them in Sam’s office. They then walk over to me, me!
Oh crap. They must know, they must know I’ve been reading April’s emails. Oh God, I’ll never be employable ever again, in any sector. Sam towers above me and tells me sternly I am to accompany him into the office.
Sam’s office barely holds enough air for four people to breathe at the best of times, let alone when those four people are fraught. I try to think why else I could be here, other than because I’ve been found out but the warm, stale air makes it hard for my grey matter to function. When we have all stopped shifting to get comfortable in our seats, Sam makes a start. He looks cross and disappointed but not panicked in the way he does after a trans-Atlantic call from Dr Claw.
“April, I don’t know what to say. I have these emails here and I must say, they have only left me one option. I’ve spoken to HR and they have given me permission to go ahead without their presence, such is the seriousness of this. They will, of course, give you an exit interview in due course.”
“What?” April says as she lurches her head forward and pops her eyes out in surprise. She had been nodding along in agreement up until the mention of her exit interview.
“I’m sorry, what?” she asks in a condescending tone.
“These emails, about Steve, how did they turn up on the printer? Don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.”
“I don’t understand?” she says, now sounding put out. She is sitting up overly straight in her chair, a perfectly manicured hand on her chest as if she has been mortally wounded. Meanwhile, I am still wondering what on earth I am doing here.
Sam and Jaycee give each other a mirrored look of certainty before Sam speaks again.
“Well, would you like to read them?” Sam asks.
“Is that necessary? Maybe you could read them out for everybody?” April suggests.
“Really?” Sam says, squinting in disbelief as we all look at each other wide-eyed.
“Um, Sam?” I say, almost at a whisper.
“Yes, err… Rachael?”
Is my name really that hard to remember? I’ve been ‘Err-Rachael’ since I got here, you’d think he might remember my name on my last day.
“I am not entirely sure why I am here,” I say as I try to refrain from squirming in my chair.
“HR couldn’t be here and you leave today. You are the most impartial, available, person we have to witness a fare dismissal, should this reach tribunal.”
“Oh. Ok,” I say as I drop my gaze back down to my lap.
“Besides,” Sam continues. “Jaycee asked for you to be here.” Then he turns his attentions back to April. “Are you sure you want me to read these? Out loud?” He wrinkles his forehead up at the very idea of it and somehow, his big hook nose seems even bigger on his thin face.
“Yes, it’s fine, go on.”
“Ok. It starts with a message from you, to your friend.”
April nods along with a frown telling Sam to carry on.
After coughing into his hand to clear his throat, Sam begins reading from the emails in his hands.
“’Morning Sezza, how’s things? Have you spoken to Sophia? Are you sure he said no?’ Then the reply, in a nutshell,” Sam says while looking up at us from the sheet of paper, “’Sophia hasn’t text me back yet but Petra has. She just said that one minute he was enjoying it and the next he was running away.’”
Hang on, these aren’t the emails from ‘Heidi’ that April prepared from Jaycee to find? Moving only my eyes I look to April for a reaction. The beginnings of a frown have made their way onto her face. She looks confused.
“Should I continue?” Sam asks.
No way!
“Yes,” April snaps haughtily as though she is completely convinced that ‘Heidi’s’ words will be the next out of Sam’s mouth.
“Ok. Then you replied, ‘I just don’t get it. Jaycee didn’t react to your text, she said it was her mum. Then Steve Macfuckpants turns down the bait. What’s going on?’ and this Sezza says ‘What’s going on is that Steve did turn down the bait, so what d’ya know? Not all men are pigs after…’”
“Enough!” April screams. The penny has dropped and she looks distressed.
“I, I don’t understand. This isn’t right,” April protests, as though she can still come out of this unscathed. I have no idea what’s going on but these are not the emails April wanted people to find. Then, out of the blue, Jaycee pipes up and makes me jump out of my chair.
“What have you got against me and Steve, April? What drove you to plant this pack of lies on the printer?” Jaycee asks, shoving the emails from ‘Heidi’ in front of April.
April reads them, then looks at the emails Sam is holding and she realises somehow, more have been discovered that the ones she intended to share.
“I don’t know!” she shouts out in despair as her eyes well up with tears.
Sam takes over again leaving Jaycee silently seething with rage.
“April, the emails I’m holding right here were found on Steve’s desk. If I carry on reading we will get to the part where you plan to set Steve up for something he didn’t do. And you executed your plan because Jaycee has the made up email conversation in her hands right there. They were found in her WI, just like you said they would be.”
“And don’t try to lie April,” Jaycee interjects. “We checked. These emails were sent to the printer by your computer at a time when you were sitting at your desk.”
“This is gross misconduct. We are going to have to let you go, with immediate effect. Do you understand?” Sam finishes.
“I’ve been set up!” she says, apparently battling with the failure of her master plan.
“Set up how, April? It seems to me you did most of the setting up here,” Jaycee says, struggling not to raise her voice. She has every reason to be angry. “I have no idea how the emails outlining your plans got here April, but even if they hadn’t, we’d have known these emails were fake.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” says April, still refusing to admit defeat.
“Well you messed up April,” Jaycee explains as she regains her former composure. Both the email from Heidi and your reply to her were sent at 10.51. There’s no way you could have read her email and replied to it all in the same minute.” Jaycee says with a satisfied look on her face. Ah, I can’t say I’d noticed that myself.
Backed into a corner, April changes tact and tries to defend her actions.
“Steve’s a creep Jaycee. He may not have accepted sexual favours from those girls but he was seeing me, sort of. I bet he didn’t tell you about us, did he? I bet you don’t know that he slept with my stripper friend, then with me. I bet he didn’t tell you any of that!”
“That’s all very nice April, but, why would he tell me any of that?” Jaycee says with the quiet confidence of somebody who has the upper hand.
April looks up at Jaycee quizzically.
“Because… because he’s your boyfriend.”
“April, Steve and I are just friends. Not that it’s any of your business.”
I throw a look of surprise at Jaycee that gives away that I too thought they were together. Maybe she’s lying to save face and get under April’s skin. I really don’t know what’s going on.
“No, no-no, you’re lying so that you don’t lose face in front of Sam and this, this temp.”
Ooh, it’s as though she read my mind.
Jaycee smiles smugly and sits back in her chair, arms folded. “I guess you’ll never know. You’ll never know if all this was worth losing your job over or not.”
Tears of frustration run down April’s face making tracks in her blusher.
Sam takes control of the situation once again.
“April, you need to go now please.”
“Ok. I’ll be at my desk.”
April says quietly as she makes to leave.
“No, April.” Sam says awkwardly. “You need to leave the building. You can take what you need from your desk now and you can come in tomorrow to take the rest. Someone will be here to… look after you.”
Chaperone you, more like.
“But…” April starts one last-ditch attempt to redeem herself then stops as she realises there is nowhere for her to go from here.
“Go, I’m so disappointed in you, just go,” Sam says dismissively.
April gets up, scowls at Jaycee, then fixes her gaze on me, her face turning crazy, for the first time since I’ve known her she has forgotten to act as though she is always on display.
“It was you! You’ve been reading my emails haven’t you? I deleted those emails and you got them back and printed them didn’t you?”
“I had nothing to do with printing those emails. I swear!”
“Yes you did! You put them on Steve’s desk! Has anybody checked the printer to see where these came from?”
“April, that’s enough, nothing has come from the temp desk to the printer today.”
“Then she did it before, check the history or something!”
“April, even if Rachael did, it doesn’t make you any less guilty, does it?” Jaycee points out. Apparently having had enough of the escalating arguments that are destined to go around in circles, Sam raises his voice sufficiently to silence all three of us.
“Enough! Just get out April.”
April sends one of her death stares my way then struts out of the office closing the door firmly behind her as if she only just managed to suppress the urge to slam it shut.
“It’s all done isn’t it Rachael?” Sam asks me. I look at him blankly, I hadn’t realised we had switched conversations back to the filing already.
“The filing?” Sam says as if I am a moron.
“Oh yes, of course, Yes Sam. It’s all done. It’s finished.”
“Good. Thank you. You did well. It should have taken nearly twice the time. The agency said you were a hard worker, and they were right.”
I silently relish in the long awaited snippet of praise for my unyielding commitment to such an arduous task.
“Jaycee, Rachael, take five minutes in the empty office if you need to… regroup or… whatever. Rachael, there is a job here for you here, if you want it? A space has come up in the billing team.”
“Oh,” I reply, dumbfounded because not only did he say my name without the pretext of ‘err’, but he actually wants to employ me.
“I thought you’d be pleased?” Sam says, frowning at me.
“Oh, no, I am, I am pleased. It’s just taken me by surprise Sam, that’s all.”
The practicalities of paying my rent flash before me, then so does my sanity. While I know beggars can’t be choosers, I’m certain this here is not the life for me.
“You might as well go for the day now Rachael, you’ll get paid for the whole day, of course. Have a think about the offer, take the weekend, and let me know on Monday,” Sam concludes.
“Ok. I will. Thanks.”
Jaycee makes a feisty exit out of the office as I get up more gingerly and linger at the door before I walk through it. I want to make up for my lack of enthusiasm at the job offer but Sam is already busying himself with other work around his desk so I just leave and close the door softly on my way out.
Jaycee and I both snake straight into the empty office but not before catching a quick glimpse of a very red faced April packing her desk away into her oversized handbag. Steve is back and is watching her, I wonder what he knows.
“Holly shit, shit, shit, fuck,” Jaycee says very articulately as she paces the room and holds her temples with both hands. I slump into the nearest chair.
“Was it you? Did you plant those emails revealing her plans on Steve’s desk?” Jaycee asks, still pacing anxiously up and down the room.
“No, it wasn’t me!”
In case you are wondering, it really wasn’t me. Jaycee ignores me and carries on talking as if it was me.
“You didn’t have to do that you know. The emails on the printer, from Heidi – April, even, they were both sent at the same time! She never did do very well in the brains department, that one.”
“Oh,” I don’t know what to say.
“And I know she only invited me out to try to set me up too. I guessed that the minute I received an anonymous text at dinner, you know, at The Coal Shed. I just don’t understand your part in it?”
“How do you mean?”
“Oh come on, you were there that night, at the pub. You sit at her desk every week and you sit right by the printer the rest of the time.”
“Ok, look, I promise you I didn’t print those emails, but…” it’s time to confess. “I did read them. I’ve been reading April’s personal emails for weeks.”
“Go on…” Jaycee finally takes a seat opposite me.
“I read something by accident, between April and Steve. It caught my attention and I read more of their email thread. I am so sorry. This became a regular Thursday afternoon, err, occurrence. I wanted to tell you, ‘don’t get back with Steve,’ then you did and I felt awful but then I knew Steve ditched April the minute he had a chance with you so I decided to stay out of it and…”
“Whoa. Settle petal, breathe. Right, Steve and I, we aren’t together.” Jaycee says, looking me square in the eye.
“But… You said… And you look all in love and… Steve has changed, you said…”
“Rachael, I haven’t had a chance to tell you yet. I’m not full of beans because I’m in love. I’m excited because I am free! I am invigorated!”
“I don’t understand?”
“I am going to India in a few weeks to work in the orphanage my parents run. Well, in between travelling the East anyway. I’m excited Rachael, excited, not in love.”
“But, you and Steve?”
“Me and Steve spent a lot of time together when we were considering a reconciliation.”
“I know, and I got the impression it was all going well?”
“Oh it was. It was. We were like best friends. And therein lays the problem. Until we spent all that time together, I thought we were made for each other but… but when we tried to kiss, we both laughed. We are like brother and sister now, not boyfriend and girlfriend. It took giving it a go for us to realise that.”
I struggle to compute.
“But, you said he had changed?”
“He has! When we both realised the spark was missing between us, I told him I was going to go to India. He was happy for me and he said he wanted to meet the right girl and settle down. Eventually, he confided in me about a girl he had met called Sophia. He met her when he took a client to The Sugar Puss. She was working there to pay her way through uni.”
“Steve likes Sophia?” I say to myself as if trying to digest the new and unexpected information.
“Yeah, he really likes her! I know he really likes her because he turned down the chance to receive oral sex from her and her and her stripper friend Petra the night April tried to set him up.”
“So you knew all about that?”
“Yes! He came over to mine after I got back from my meal with April and told me all about it. Sophia did what her friend had asked but was really pleased when Steve turned it down because she likes him too. Steve and I were both laughing at how he thought it was wrong to start a potential relationship with someone by doing… that… with her and her friend! He said no because he had too much respect for Sophia. And now, she has given up her job at the Sugar Puss so she can have a proper relationship with Steve.”
Sezza’s email pops into my head, about her being glad she didn’t hand in her notice because Sophia handed hers in on the same night she’d planned to hand hers in. It’s all starting to make sense.
“But, he loves you? Doesn’t he?” I say, still two steps behind.
“He just thought he did – same as me. We will always be a part of each other’s lives but without the spark, what have you got, really?”
“I guess. I can’t believe I got all this so totally wrong. So, what does he think about you going to India?”
“He is really happy for me. He knows I’ve always wanted to do it. And I am happy for him. He finally has the maturity to turn down meaningless sex for the chance of something lasting. I’m almost proud of him!” Jaycee says, laughing at herself.
“Wow. So April didn’t have to go to all that trouble at all then?”
“No, but it showed her true colours didn’t it?”
“Yeah,” I agree, “I am really glad for you. I am really glad you are able to go to India without any doubts or ‘what if’s’ over Steve.”
“I know! It’s perfect. And how about you? Will you take Sam up on his job offer?”
“I don’t know. I need to be earning so it’s tempting but, if I’m honest, this isn’t really me.”
“Well, you could ask Sam to have a trial here to take the financial pressure off while you figure out what is you?”
“True… That’s not a bad idea. I just, I don’t get it. How the hell did those emails end up on Steve’s desk? April surely couldn’t have printed those ones by mistake, could she?” I say, my mind still after answers to what went on today.
“You mean, it really wasn’t you?”
“I promise you Jaycee, hand on heart. What reason do I have to lie?”
“Hmm, I have no idea either then.”
“Look, I’m going to have to go and speak to Steve in a minute. He’s pretty upset by all this. He didn’t really want his personal life splashed around the office.”
“Oh, sure, yeah you go.” I say, not realising I was keeping her.
“Look, enjoy your weekend, I’ll be looking at your desk on Monday morning, hoping to see you in it. And if you’re not, well, it has been a pleasure having you here Rachael, I mean that.”
“It’s been a pleasure meeting you too Jaycee, you’ve really helped me with this Derren saga.”
“Good, I’m happy to have helped. Just remember, Derren is just one little part of your life. There’s a whole world out there to go and see. Who knows what you’ll find and how happy it will make you. It’s all too easy to get caught up in one little… Oh, listen to me preaching again. It’s just, well, I’ve been there.”
Jaycee smiles knowingly and warmly and I smile back.
“Well, who knows, maybe one day I’ll do more than just imagine I’m in some faraway place.”
“You’ll be fine Rachael; you are just at the start of something big; I can feel it.”
“Thanks Jaycee.”
“No worries, look, I’m going to head off now, good luck ok?”
“You too, in India I mean. I wish you all the best.”
“Thanks.”
Jaycee gives me a tight hug before we leave the empty office. She is so tall she has to stoop or else my head would be where her cleavage would be, if she had one that is.
As I clear my desk away, people who barely uttered a word to me over the past twelve weeks come over to say goodbye. I hope IT Dave will too but he stays fast in his chair. Although I have never really spoken to IT Dave, I have become quite fond of him. I really do hope he has someone to go home to at the end of a lonely day in the office.
Sam apologises for not getting me a leaving card, actually, scratch that, Sam tells me it isn’t company policy to buy leaving cards for temps, and then he clumsily adds he might see me on Monday anyway. After itching to get out of Lourdes Components for the last three months I find that now that I’m leaving, I am actually rather sad to go. And I wasn’t going to admit it but as I start the engine of my car to leave the car park for the last time, a little lump forms in my throat. This has been my home for the past three months.
That’s when, just as unexpectedly, a figure appears at my car window. Taken completely by surprise, I wind the window down. It’s IT Dave.
“IT Dave! I mean… Dave!” I say affably. I’m so glad he has come to say goodbye.
“I’ve just come to collect the Christmas tree. Is it still in your boot?”
“Oh, yes, I’d forgotten all about that!”
I pop my boot open and get out of the car to help. Secretly I am hoping I have left nothing personal in there since it went in all those weeks ago.
“I know about the drama this afternoon.” I.T Dave says to me while shuffling nervously on his feet. I am so surprised he initiated a conversation with me that I stand there almost dumbstruck. We both stand there by the open boot, looking down at the fake tree branches in their clear plastic liner.
“I hope you won’t leave here with a bad taste in your mouth because of it,” he mumbles, still reluctant to look me in the eye.
“Oh, thank you for your concern but, I won’t. That April is a bad egg. I’m sure there are people in the office who will be pleased to see her go,” I say, thinking about Steve.
“Yes, Steve especially, I imagine,” he says as he wrinkles his already wrinkled forehead.
“Oh, so, you know what happened? How?”
“April told me, but not in so many words,” he finally looks at me but then quickly returns his gaze to the tree in my boot.
“Oh?”
“Well I better go now. Nice to meet you Rachael,” Dave says, ignoring my one worded inquiry and reaching for the bag of Christmas tree arms.
“Yeah, nice to meet you to,” I say as slowly as half my mind lingers over his comment. He found out from April, but not in so many words. I help him lift the bag out of the boot then slam it shut.
“Do you need a hand taking that in?”
“No, no, I’ll be ok. Nice to meet you Rachael.”
“You too,” I say as he walks away, then, more urgently I shout,
“Dave?”
Dave stops and turns back, the bag of tree slung over his shoulder.
“Yes?”
“Any idea how those emails ended up on Steve’s desk? The ones outlining April’s plans?” I ask thinking, he is the guy who would receive flagged emails due to inappropriate language.
“No,” he shakes his head. “Must be divine intervention.” He says with a sly smile and a wink before walking back towards the office.
As I drive home, I consider the look IT Dave gave me. It was as though he was telling me something, but what? Divine? Why did he emphasise divine? Then it hits me all at once. My mind flits back to the day Sam gave me a tour of the office. We may all know him as IT Dave but his name is David Vine. IT Dave is D. Vine. Divine intervention indeed.
“That dark horse!” I find myself exclaiming as I drive. I can’t believe it was innocent I.T Dave who planted April’s plans on Steve’s desk. I guess it’s true what they say about watching the quiet ones! Questions fill my mind that I’d love to have answers to but fear I never will. How long has he been reading the emails for? Since April put the spacing in the wrong place in the word ‘shagged’ in my second week? Or more recently, when she referred to Steve as Macfuckpants? Or even before then? Who knows what went on before I came! And did he know I was reading her emails? I bet he did. I can think of more than one occasion I knew I.T Dave was in eyeshot of the screen at April’s desk yet I carried on reading her emails regardless. He was just so quiet that I’d almost lost all caution around him. And come to think of it, I.T Dave was around the morning I took the back off of April’s chair. And he was always in and out of the kitchen when Jaycee and I were talking. We did our best to limit what we said in front of him but we didn’t give it the same weight as anybody else who walked into the kitchen. He knew. There’s no two ways about it. He knew and he intervened divinely.
Later that night I find myself eating turkey stew (because Martha didn’t like the look of the beef in the supermarket) at Victor’s house. Beef or turkey, I’m not fussed, it’s delicious, it’s homemade and I didn’t have to cook it. While I scoop up some parsnip and dumpling, I ask Victor what he wanted to speak to me about because so far, all he has talked about is the charity he works for. He told me he works for a man called Leon and they create awareness of mental illness issues in developing countries. He said they raise money and send volunteer doctors out to assess needs and educate where they can. Listening makes me feel a little sad I had to quit my occupational therapy role but I try my best not to dwell as I listen to Victor speak with a spoonful of stew held half way between his bowl and his mouth. Somehow, Victor manages to avert the subject of what any of this has to do with me and we are back onto the last project they arranged in Cambodia and how there is talk of the media getting involved one day, perhaps even to make a documentary. We are all eating jam roly-poly and custard by the time he gets around to telling me what any of this has to do with me.
“I suppose you’re wondering what this all has to do with you?”
Martha gives Victor an excited side glance before returning her plump, smiley face to me.
“Can you tell?” I jest. There’s no point in hiding it, I’ve been itching with suspense since I walked in and they both know it. Victor and Martha both look at me, smiling and I look on at Victor in anticipation. Is he about to offer me a job? I wonder. I am so excited by the prospect of being a part of everything Victor has just described that I force myself to repress the idea in case I’m wrong.
“Well, how would you like to spend a day at our office to see what we do and to meet Leon?”
“What?” I say, dumbfounded.
“If you like what you see and Leon is on board, there is a job for you, with us.”
My stomach churns with excitement and suddenly the home cooked meal feels squashed in my belly as it makes room for butterflies.
“You should know that the job involves a great deal of writing…”
“And fundraising…” Martha adds.
“Yes, and fundraising. And potentially, a great deal of travelling.”
Goosebumps tingle up the back of my neck as I hear Jaycee’s voice in my mind.
There’s a whole world out there to go and see. Who knows what you’ll find and how happy it will make you.
You’ll be fine Rachael; you are just at the start of something big; I can feel it.
Would I have considered a job that might take me all over the world if Jaycee hadn’t opened my mind to it? I honestly don’t know. But she has and there is no doubt in my mind what to say to this offer.
“When do you want me?” I ask, already feeling my horizons broadening from my flat, the Tavern, and Derren.
“How does Monday sound?”
“Monday sounds just perfect.”
Later that night I lay in bed thinking about what the future holds for me now. Will it involve working at Lourdes in accounts with Sam as my boss? No. That lonely chair by the printer will be empty come Monday morning. Does it consist of working for Victor and this Leon for a mental illness awareness charity? I hope so, I really hope so. Then there’s Derren, whether or not he will be a part of my future, I do not know.
All I know is that the people we meet shape us and the experiences we have allow us to evolve. I find myself hoping Jaycee enjoys the East, Steve enjoys his ex-stripper, Sophia, and April the office slut finds a way to get through life with a little more grace in the future. What she tried to do may have been wrong, but we all deserve a second chance to become better versions of ourselves.
Don’t we?
The End
Or is it? If you would like to follow Rachael into her new job and the journey it takes her on, please read When Tigers Attack, available as a paperback for 8.99 at…
http://novelsbynicola.com/store/
or as an Ebook for 1.95 (you can download a free sample before buying) at Amazon…
